My distant friend, remains my closest
Friendship means a variety of things to different people. Love, relation, time, memories. Everyone has a reason why a certain friendship exists. But what really makes one friendship different than the other? more love? more memories? more time spent together? We don’t really think about the reasons for a friendship until something changes it. For better or worse. We never seem to find the need to look back and really ask ourselves “why does this friendship exist?” I always went by the saying similar to “don’t ever regret a friendship, they are all learning experiences” and for me, this statement holds true. Friends good or bad are meant to enter your life for purpose none other than to be part of your journey. Everyone has a story, and what would a story be without any characters?
Up until this point of my life, I could use one hand to count the true, genuine friends I’ve had. As different as each of those friendships were, they were also very similar in the way they unfolded. That instant connection you feel with a person when you first meet them, and you just know you’re going to be BFF’s. As corny as it sounds, it has happened to me with every good friend I’ve had. Best friends always start off being completely inseparable. connected at the hip. Never seen apart. It’s one of the most amazing feelings, to just have someone to trust and share things with. Unfortunately mine all ended the same way too. distance. It’s funny how a relationship that started on vibes and time spent together can be altered and left with only a space between & memories. All of them started & ended that way. Gaining what you think will be your partner in crime for life but ending with only phone calls to keep you in contact. I watched this same act play out for all of my “best friends” and when I finally decided I was not meant to have that side kick, I was blessed with the only person who opened my eyes to true friendship. For me, most situations have been an overdose of time together ends in painful time a part.
One of the reasons I knew this blessing of a friend was meant to be, was because in this new found friendship I had, we were already breaking the rules. We were’t following the typical route I normally took. We found a connection through distance. we found a bond through messages. sharing your secrets and insecurities with someone who you only have heard their voice through a phone & seen pictures of over the computer, is one of the strangest, most rewarding things I’ve done. Finding such a connection with a person you have never met, is something even I could laugh at someone for. but only when you have found such a person, can you make that choice to find humor in such a beautiful thing. True friendship grows stronger as time goes on. For most people that time spent together is crucial. it’s what holds it all together. enjoying each others company and being able to really see a person in their true form. that’s how majority of friendships last. but this one is different. this one does not rely on physical time spent together or sleepovers and movie nights. this relationship consists of only one thing. friendship. true, raw, irreplaceable friendship. This person entered the library of my mind. She sat down, and she started with the first book I handed her. & she read every page. Even if the cover wasn’t her taste she still opened up her mind to my story. All I ever wanted was for someone to listen to me. hear my feelings and thoughts. but what I really needed, was to hear someone elses. What I thought I wanted was someone who has all these things in common with me and is willing to let me pour my heart out to them at any given moment. but I was wrong. that wasn’t what I wanted at all.
What I really needed was someone to show me how to truly appreciate a person. I always thought of myself as a good listener to friends but not the best to give advice. My new friend told me the opposite. She expressed time and time again how much my words made her feel better and without knowing it, that was all I ever wanted. I thought I always lacked having someone there for me, but what I ended up getting more fulfillment in, was being there for someone else. I was needed as much as I needed. I now had someone to be that person I run to when something crazy happens. or when I’m excited about something of feeling super bummed. She always remained with open arms. & as much as I enjoy being there for her when she needs me, I can’t help but be more than appreciative of what she helps me through. Happy times and sad times. we are always always each other’s support. My best friend always know when I need a confident boost and she can always see past my “I’m okay” and refuses to let me go a whole day without smiling..We are so similar and so different. We can share our common interests or introduce new things to each other. We laugh, we cry, we make memories. One thing we always bring up, is how we wished we lived closer. fantasizing about being neighbors and being up all hours of the night watching movies or lounging in a hammock all day. This one started with distance and rely’s soley on the phone calls and messages to keep us going. and I have never felt closer to any friend before.
Over the years I have believed more and more that fate does exist. Connecting with a person over social media due to common interest in music is not how you would expect to find your best friend. but if you just so happen to stumble across such a sweet, kind hearted & perfect person, you better make her your BFF too. it’s not often you get blessed with such a person that has more talent and strength than you have ever seen. So if you ever happen to ask yourself “why does this friendship exist?” just remember, there is a reason. You just have to find that friend that puts the meaning behind it. xox
Guest Post By My Beautiful Friend Ashley. A friend who turned into a sister.