Being the Star Wars nerd that I am, my first thoughts were of the various planets in the original Trilogy: I ruled out Tatooine right off the bat, mostly because of the climate (I’m from Alaska, you know) and also because Mos Eisley’s such a wretched hive of scum and villainy. Admittedly, I found the cantina a bit tempting (I could see myself frequenting that place), but it wasn’t enough to outweigh the downsides. And even though I’m from Alaska, I was, of course, able to rule out Hoth very quickly-the whole planet is just plain inhospitable-and there doesn’t seem to be much to do there. The forests of Endor could be pleasant at times, but I’d really be out of place without any sort of a pub, and no apparent form of commerce. Also, cute as Ewoks can be, I can’t imagine myself enjoying time with them more than once in a blue moon.

Then, there’s Dagobah: honestly very tempting to my spiritual side, but I’m not ready to live the life of a swamp-monk-perhaps if I were asked this question in about 25 years it would be a legitimate candidate for me.

I’m a big fan of the Arthurian legends too, and Avalon, of course, crossed my mind: a most beautiful place of warmth and healing, but-once again-I don’t think I’m ready for that sort of isolation, magical as it may be. I’ve never heard of anything like taverns or record stores (or even electricity!) in Avalon, and at this stage in my life I believe I’d find myself bored much of the time. Another place perhaps to be listed next to Dagobah for when I’m asked about this many years from now (and I DO mean many).

I thought briefly about my all-time favorite novel, “Don Quixote.” Many fine places throughout this book-plenty of taverns, excitement, and even Gypsies (major consideration for the Gypsy part). Also, of course, plenty of beautiful terrain and opportunities to enjoy nature. However, I’m just not fond of that much travelling, and if I were to live in Don Quixote’s Spain, I’d never really be able to settle down-and that would annoy me greatly.

So I fell back on another trilogy, this time Tolkein’s “Lord Of The Rings.” I immediately thought of the Shire, and it just sort of “felt” right, felt nice. The Shire is a remote, peaceful place that the rest of middle earth never bothers with. The Hobbits are an amiable people, but have some feistiness to them as well. The land is gorgeous and comforting, but more importantly there are nearby taverns. The Green Dragon in Bywater would be a great place to wind down at after a long day of recording-it’s a pleasant atmosphere for people of my ilk. And on weekends, it’s not too far a journey into Bree, where my band mates and I could tear it up at the Prancing Pony-maybe even get gigs in Bree once in a while? Plenty of commerce in Bree, so I’m sure I’d be able to find something equivalent to a record store, and some people that carry with them just the proper amount of seediness. I’d be able to isolate myself in a peaceful environment anytime I chose-and would, of course, be able to settle down and not have to travel too much. And even though it may seem like a small thing to others, I’m VERY fond of the round doors that adorn Hobbit houses (it’s a big plus for me).

I stopped all manner of searching for an answer to the awesome question as to where I’d live if I could choose any world from a movie or novel at that point. It is, for me, the Shire without a doubt. I could live a long, happy life among the Hobbits, and my narcissistic side believes they’d enjoy having me-they’d like me at least half as much as I’d like them-and that’s good enough for all of us. That’s my answer, and I’m sticking to it.

Kev Atomic

xoxo

Follow Kevin on twitter @atomic_honey